Love follows patterns long before it follows logic.

The gaps you experienced growing up can quietly become the blueprint for how you look for love. 

If you were praised, you might seek a partner who gives you compliments. 
If you were criticized, you might search for someone who approves of you. 
If you were overlooked, you might chase attention. 

You likely do these things because they feel familiar, not because they’re healthy. 

But here's the truth…

What you want from others, you can give yourself.

If you’re looking for external validation, practice validating yourself first.
If you’re craving affection, offer yourself kindness.
If you’re yearning to be understood, begin by becoming aware of your own emotions.

When you stop choosing people to fill a gap within you, you start choosing people to walk alongside you.

So instead of asking yourself, “Why do I keep meeting the same type of person?”

Ask yourself, “What am I hoping someone will give me?”

You start attracting different people and experiencing healthier relationships when you finally decide to give yourself what you’re looking for from someone else.

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Today’s Wiser Choice:

Try This:

  1. Pick one thing you’ve been seeking from others: validation, attention, reassurance, affection, etc. 

  2. Create a small way to give it to yourself today:

    • Write a note acknowledging your effort.

    • Treat yourself to an act of kindness: make your favorite meal, take a walk, buy yourself flowers. 

  3. Notice how it feels to receive it from yourself first, instead of waiting for someone else.

Instead of trying to find someone to fill one of your gaps, try engaging with people from a place of fullness, curiosity, and presence.

The content in this newsletter is provided for general informational and educational purposes only and is not intended as, and must not be taken as, medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Nothing in this newsletter creates, or is intended to create, a physician–patient or other healthcare professional–patient relationship. You should always consult a qualified physician or other licensed healthcare provider regarding any questions you may have about a medical condition, your health, or any treatment options, and before starting, changing, or stopping any medication, treatment, or wellness program. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay seeking it because of something you have read in this newsletter.

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