Read time: 5 minutes.
This is your permission to pause and take a little time for yourself.

Translated to mean “loving kindness”, maitrī (or mettā, as it is more commonly called in Buddhist teachings), is more than just being kind to others. At its heart is the understanding that all human beings, regardless of how they behave, are driven by many of the same fundamental needs: to feel safe, to be happy, and to be free from suffering.

But does practising mettā mean you have to tolerate bad behaviour?

I don’t think so. For me, that’s not what the teaching asks. Understanding why someone behaves a certain way doesn’t excuse bad behaviour. But it can help us respond with more peace and less resentment.

Compassion doesn’t require us to abandon ourselves. It simply invites us to look beyond another person’s behaviour and consider what might be driving it, even if we choose to walk away.

That understanding can become a mirror for our own behaviour, too. It helps us recognize our own toxic patterns, including the moments when our attempts to feel safe, loved, or happy have led us to act in harmful ways as well.

Perhaps that is the deeper practice: to recognize the humanity in someone else without ever forgetting our own.

Love,
Jay ❤️

Remember, I’m in your corner today, tomorrow, and anytime you need a little permission to believe that everything is going to work out.